I have been reading a lot more recently. But when I say “a lot more”, keep in mind that that’s a very subjective description of the amount of reading I have been doing. Which is essentially reading a lot as opposed to… none. 

When I was younger, I read a lot. I devoured books, and there was nothing that got me going in my late adolescent years like a five-book YA fantasy series, 500 pages a book. For my 11th birthday, my mom gifted me my own Webster’s dictionary. And I don’t know what was more embarrassing about that, the idea that my mother thought that was something I would like or the fact that she was right. 

Like a lot of us, I fell out of reading as I got older and fell more into my screens. TV took less energy than reading and a cellphone contained every piece of information I might have wanted to know at any given time, so books just slowly stopped capturing my attention in the same way. My mother got me a Kindle for Christmas when I was a freshman in high school and I don’t think I read a single book with it. Instead, I laid in bed and used it to binge all 7 seasons of the classic BBC television show Doctor Who. And maybe that is part of why boys did not like me in high school. 

I was homeschooled up until 5th grade and I remember when I first started attending public school, I learned about a program called “Accelerated Reader”.

For those that aren’t familiar with Accelerated Reader, fondly known as AR, the program is described on its website as intended to “Motivate, monitor, and manage student’s independent reading practice and watch as students develop a true love for reading”. And oh, did it motivate me.

The program consists of online comprehension quizzes you take after reading a book. Every book is worth a certain number of points, and if you pass the quiz you are awarded the appropriate number of AR points. The middle school I attended kept a chart on the wall in the hallway to celebrate students as they reached certain reading milestones, 100 points, 200 points, etc. 

I have always been a competitive person, so you might be able to imagine the way it shook 5th-grade me to my absolute bones when I realized it was possible to READ competitively. Fresh out of 10 years of homeschooling, I was obviously very socially well-adjusted. Throughout that year, I accumulated so many points that the teachers had to add an extra tier at the top of the chart in the hallway in order to account for the number of points I had obsessively collected. Needless to say, I won reading that year at Eureka Springs Middle School. 

In addition to being competitive, the other thing I have always been is an activist. One of my first organized movements was at 11 years old: a revolt against banned books in school. I couldn’t comprehend any entity being allowed to restrict public access to certain literature or information, and it certainly went against all my values as an accomplished Accelerated Reader. So a few of my classmates and I rallied against the school as they tried to remove a book from the library: Breaking Dawn. The 4th and final book in Stephanie Meyer’s groundbreaking teenage vampire romance series, Twilight.

In reflection, I don’t think anyone was trying to get Breaking Dawn on a banned book list to censor literary expression, I just think the middle school didn’t want to facilitate 11-year-olds reading about vampire sex. Nonetheless, I rallied my classmates and we ensured the book stayed in the library for generations of 11-year-olds to come. 

I found over time that the more reading I had to do for school, the less I wanted to read when I got home. I think school ruined reading for a lot of us, and I think it tried to make a case for ruining learning as well. When you have to write, read, and learn about an assortment of things that don’t matter to you, you lose a lot of energy and enthusiasm to dedicate to the things that actually do. 

In the last two years, I have rediscovered my ability to enjoy reading again by finally giving in to the compelling world of well-written fiction. In late 2021, I decided to read Hank Green’s critically acclaimed first novel, “An Absolutely Remarkable Thing”, based on a recommendation from a stranger on the internet who read a lot more books than I did, so obviously it had to be a good. And I read that book faster than I had read a book in years. It’s a well-thought-out science fiction novel that explores social media fame, the relentless evolution of technology, and the complexity of queer relationships. 

I scarfed the book down and was devastated to realize with only 15 pages left that it was going to end in a cliffhanger and I’d shortly need to make my way to the store to buy the sequel. With a mission on my mind, I lapped the block only once looking for parking before pulling into the private pay-to-park lot around the corner from the local used bookstore. It was just me and one other car in an otherwise empty lot, so I climbed out of my car and decided I’d be in and out so fast there was no need to feed the meter. I half jogged into the bookstore, proud of myself for choosing to shop locally and used instead of ordering online. Upon venturing back to my car, I watched from afar as parking enforcement tucked a ticket into my windshield, making a $20 book into a $60 one. No good deed goes unpunished. 

As I’ve navigated my relationship with reading in recent years, I feel like I’ve learned a few things that have helped me enjoy the practice again. So here are three little lessons I’ve learned that I’ll give you now so you can skip figuring them out yourself.

1. Not every book you read has to make you better. We are not works in progress, constantly requiring updates, lessons, or reworks. We are whole and complete humans that enjoy trashy fiction sometimes. 
2. You don’t have to finish all of the books that you start. If you don’t like a book, put it down and pick up another. It’s not necessary to guilt yourself into finishing things you don’t like in life, just because you started them. Sometimes we are allowed to just do what we enjoy, and yes that is a metaphor. Don’t force yourself to swim laps for exercise if you simply hate swimming.
3. Reading actually does make you better than everyone around you. So do it for no other reason than the superiority you’ll earn over your friends. 

And for anyone else that has struggled to get back into reading recently, I wanted to share a few of my favorite easily digestible picks. 

1. City of Girls by Elizabeth Gilbert
2. An Absolutely Remarkable Thing and its sequel A Beautifully Foolish Endeavor by Hank Green
3. The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo by Taylor Jenkins Reid
4. The Prophet by Kahlil Gibran
5. Wintering: The Power of Rest and Retreat in Difficult Times by Katherine May
6. The Five People You Meet in Heaven by Mitch Albom
7. Educated by Tara Westover
8. Ishmael by Daniel Quinn

I don’t have any other advice to share other than to fill your bookshelf with books that bring you joy. And wander around the city till you find Little Free Libraries to swap out the ones that don’t. Recommend books to your friends. Sit in coffee shops and parks and revel in being better than everyone else. Slow down, learn, turn off your phone, enjoy yourself again. It’s worth it.